I didn't have a television when Seinfeld's #Festivus episode aired, and at the time might have found it infectious, but nowadays it's eclipsed by the overall contempt I have for the 'holiday season' and how profoundly illusory and demeaning the 'spirit of giving' & etc. once a year is.
so please, clear the way peacably on the highway so i can push on home from the liquor store without any desperate dramas.